Does anyone else find it difficult to get another job while you are currently employed? Most people say that it's easier to get a job while you have a job, but that has never been the case for me. What normally happens is I go to an interview with the knowledge that I can mess up the interview and perform poorly. Sometimes I ask questions that I know are going to make the interviewer uncomfortable. This is probably both good and bad. Most jobs I have landed happened when I was unemployed.

My company strongly encourages us to use copilot for coding. I have two “vibe coders” in my team. Sometimes they do funny things (like writing a separate java class with getters for two constants, complete with a test class - all AI generated and absolute BS), but most days, it’s taking a toll on the rest of us. The most annoying part is that the management praises the “creative duo” while we struggle, trying to put out their fires and keep the code quality decent.

I’m a 35-year-old in Seattle, and I’m genuinely terrified that I’m already becoming too old for this industry. I looked around our all-hands meeting yesterday and realized that except for upper management, almost everyone on the engineering team is fresh out of college age. They can pull all-nighters without blinking, while my back hurts if I sit in the wrong chair for two hours. Are we all just silently sliding toward an expiration date once we hit our late 30s? How do you stay relevant?

I got dinged on my latest review for not participating enough in the team channels, and I feel like I’m back in middle school. Apparently, shipping clean, bug-free code ahead of schedule takes a backseat to not dropping enough memes in the #random channel. My manager literally told me that social presence is a core metric for our remote culture this year. Is this normal? I’m so grumpy about it.

The work culture on my team is pretty bad. There is high burn out, lots of fighting, finger pointing, working 24/7. When I bring this up, the leaders mention that this is just how tech culture is. It is worse at other companies. I haven’t worked at another company so I feel like I can’t counter. What should I say?